On Conflict, feat. Stan Christiansen | Traces, Appendix 25

A conversation with Stan Christiansen about negotiation, difficult conversations, conflict resolution, relationship management, ethics, questioning our assumptions and more.

Find me at cristian@ccb.life

About the Guest:
Stan Christiansen teaches Negotiation at Stanford. He was the Co-Founder and Managing Director for Arbor Advisors (arboradvisors.com). He started his career working in corporate finance on Wall Street, then worked as a negotiation advisor with the consulting arm of The Harvard Negotiation Project. In this capacity he traveled to over 75 countries and worked with corporations and governments, negotiating transactions and mediating conflicts. Before co-founding Arbor, Stan was the General Manager of a Linux-based software company. He graduated from Brigham Young University and has an MBA from The Harvard Business School. He is a former Kellogg Fellow and a member of The Council on Foreign Relations. He is currently on the faculty of The Stanford School of Engineering where he teaches Negotiation and Sustainable Development.


References:
- Roger Fisher's Getting to Yes (book): https://amzn.to/3UIYnd0
- Yascha Mounk's The Identity Trap: A Story of Ideas and Power in Our Time (book): https://amzn.to/49fieVM
- Dan Goleman's Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (book): https://amzn.to/3wihNv9
- Doug Stone, Bruce Patton, and Sheila Heen's Diffilcult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most (book): https://amzn.to/3SY3Ye9
- Michael Sandel's Justice (lecture series): Justice: What's The Right Thing To Do? Episode 01 "THE MORAL SIDE OF MURDER"
- Michael Sandel's The Tyranny of Merit: What's Become of the Common Good? (book): https://amzn.to/3SXXSKK
- Jonathan Haidt's The Righteous Mind: Why Good People Are Divided by Politics and Religion (book): https://amzn.to/49gUr7F
- Jonathan Sacks' Morality: Restoring the Common Good in Divided Times (book): https://amzn.to/48f32GJ
- Neil Postman's Amusing Ourselves to Death: Public Discouse in the Age of Show Business (book): https://amzn.to/48f32GJ
- Johann Hari's Stolen Focus: Why You Can't Pay Attention -- and How to Think Deeply Again (book): https://amzn.to/48f32GJ

Timestamps:
00:20 Introduction and Setting the Stage
00:28 The World of Conflict and the Role of Negotiation
00:52 Stan Christensen's Journey into Negotiation
02:22 The Impact of Negotiation Skills in Various Life Aspects
03:34 Understanding the Concept of Negotiation
04:06 The Role of Negotiation in Corporate Life
05:07 Why People Struggle with Negotiation
06:44 Redefining Negotiation and Overcoming Zero-Sum Games
08:02 The Importance of Education in Changing Negotiation Mindsets
08:24 The Power of Objective Criteria in Negotiation
11:05 The Role of BATNA in Negotiation
18:04 The Ethics of Negotiation
23:12 The Complexity of Real-World Negotiations
30:36 The Danger of Oversimplifying and Anchoring in Negotiations
38:28 Understanding Identities and Assumptions in Negotiations
43:12 The Power of Simple, Straightforward Principles
43:31 Understanding Complimentary Interests in Negotiation
44:58 Separating People from Problems
46:03 The Importance of Relationship Building
46:40 The Role of Emotional Intelligence in Negotiation
47:54 The Impact of Popularized Concepts
48:08 The Power of Difficult Conversations
56:26 The Role of Morality in Negotiation
57:28 The Importance of Listening and Empathy
01:10:25 The Importance of Diverse Perspectives
01:17:48 The Power of Apology in Conflict Resolution

Chapters

• 0:00 25) Stan Christiansen
• 0:20 Introduction and Setting the Stage
• 0:28 The World of Conflict and the Role of Negotiation
• 0:52 Stan Christensen's Journey into Negotiation
• 2:22 The Impact of Negotiation Skills in Various Life Aspects
• 3:34 Understanding the Concept of Negotiation
• 4:06 The Role of Negotiation in Corporate Life
• 5:07 Why People Struggle with Negotiation
• 6:44 Redefining Negotiation and Overcoming Zero-Sum Games
• 8:02 The Importance of Education in Changing Negotiation Mindsets
• 8:24 The Power of Objective Criteria in Negotiation
• 11:05 The Role of BATNA in Negotiation
• 18:04 The Ethics of Negotiation
• 23:12 The Complexity of Real-World Negotiations
• 30:36 The Danger of Oversimplifying and Anchoring in Negotiations
• 38:28 Understanding Identities and Assumptions in Negotiations
• 43:12 The Power of Simple, Straightforward Principles
• 43:31 Understanding Complimentary Interests in Negotiation
• 44:58 Separating People from Problems
• 46:03 The Importance of Relationship Building
• 46:40 The Role of Emotional Intelligence in Negotiation
• 47:54 The Impact of Popularized Concepts
• 48:08 The Power of Difficult Conversations
• 56:26 The Role of Morality in Negotiation
• 57:28 The Importance of Listening and Empathy
• 1:10:25 The Importance of Diverse Perspectives
• 1:17:48 The Power of Apology in Conflict Resolution